so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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