you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
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