I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize