it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
