She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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