Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
soo... how was my night?
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