Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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