My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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