i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
