No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
