Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
