I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
