DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
this will be a night to untag.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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