I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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