She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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