Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize