is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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