everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
false alarm, still single
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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