I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
