i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
