my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
i think my cat just said my name.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
