i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
