I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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