Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize