Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
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