Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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