this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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