WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my shit smells like andre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize