i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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