What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
you win again, gameday.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
