thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
