I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Randomize
