Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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