you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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