I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
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In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
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I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.