Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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