return my video game
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
