I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She is in my trunk
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
