We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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