Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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