Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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