So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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