Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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