I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
