I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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