That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
