You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
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our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
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My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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