Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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