so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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