woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
